August 26, 2005
It is officially two years to the day that I met my wife. Last week I was concerned over what we could do to celebrate. I decided upon taking my lovely bride and daughter to lunch... In Aspen! Yeah, Aspen, in Colorado! Sure, my veggie sandwich would cost $15, my soda would be $4 and gas was over $3 a gallon, but this was our anniversary! We wanted to see the $20,000,000 homes, where Don Johnson tried to rip off a grocery store, do a little wine tasting (at Garfield Estates, owned by a couple of computer nerds who helped start Netscape) and possibly do a bit of people watching. And what a wonderful time we had driving there, too. All 1000 miles round trip mind you, but none of it regretted...
120 miles into our trip we stopped in Richfield, Utah for the finest omelete I have had to date at the Little Wonder Cafe. You will not be let down dropping by yourself sometime... Another 120 miles along we stopped and ran around the cliffs and mountains just before crossing into Colorado. It is a long drive we dubbed, "The next 5 miles are just like the last," but that doesn't express the beauty of the scenery, just the boredom experienced in stretches where your passenger is snoring! Kidding, and 120 miles farther we stopped by Grand Junction, Colorado but everything we would have wanted to see was closed. Once fueled up, we headed off to find a quiet place to lay on the hood of our car and watch the moon and stars come out. The sky was clear and the mountains smelled like fresh pine...
Tired by this point, we called it a night in Glenwood Springs where we spent the next morning walking around the shops before taking the most wonderful portion of the trip towards Aspen. Once there, all I can say is that it is everything you have heard, minus the snow. It is late August and all... For lunch I had another egg dish that tasted more like quiche, which I hate, laughs... The only bad thing about the mini-vacation would be flames at the side of the road. Because it is the dry season here and because Utah cannot go a day without lightning setting something on fire, we actually witnessed a storm on the way home creating blazes across the countryside. I must admit, I am glad to be back home. This woman and that baby have changed my life. I never knew what I was missing until they came along. So, folks, wish a very Happy Anniversary to the Lemmon Family!
August 23, 2005
You have asked what I am working on. It is called Mr. Las Vegas Nevada and it is a film script. Here is an unedited excerpt from the rough draft. It begins with a parody of/salute to something else; see if you can guess what....
A desert wind blows wildly. From somewhere within the darkness comes the thumping, heart pounding sounds of the KISS song "Under The Rose." Images of strippers, casinos, restaurants, bartenders, booze and shows like Wayne Newton and Charo flash momentarily across the screen.
A logo for the title MR LAS VEGAS NEVADA appears looking like the Welcome to Las Vegas sign we have all seen in various vacation oriented advertisements. A split second later, night turns into day and we hear:
"If it weren't for those uppity foreigners, I might have wanted to stay in California . But all they do is clog up the artery of life like cholesterol. I am not prejudice mind you, I just don't get it. Who does? Frikken Canadians, eh?"
The voice is of GERN BLANSTON, wealthy entrepreneur but we really aren't sure the source of his income. He is truly a man of mystery.
BLANSTON Continues: If I had any idea we were going to be drinking for 6 months straight and it was mostly going to be a beverage ranging from 9% alcohol to straight tequila by the glass, I would have wore a larger bib.
A red convertible Chevrolet Sunbird circa 1990 zooms across the screen and it has two passengers. The car is known as THE GO GO MACHINE.
We follow the car with our eyes as it speeds towards LAS VEGAS around noon time.
One of the persons in the GO GO MACHINE hollers as though he is on fire and no one is willing to hand him a glass of water.
THE GO GO MACHINE just keeps on go go going as the song “Monkey Business” by DANGER DANGER wails from the car's stereo speakers.
The driver, GERN BLANSTON, tan, fit, wearing sunglasses, no shirt, medium length hair blowing in the wind, takes a sip from a 40 ounce bottle of dark colored beer and leans forward to keep his eye on the road. He sits the bottle between his legs and begins rubbing himself all over to stay awake.
Beside GERN, staring directly into the desert sun like a fool, wearing a turtle neck sweater to make matters worse, is his highly mental and unstable business associate, JAKE JORDAN who sometimes referred to as FOCKER but we are never certain why.
“Lips And Hips” by the ELECTRIC BOYS blares as BLANSTON swigs some more booze, this time it is a bottle of gin with a lime floating in it. He looks over at JAKE and then stares straight ahead again. JAKE is trying to light a cigarette but the matches keep blowing out in the open wind.
BLANSTON: I can always pull over you addict. You'd have better luck trying to race me to Vegas on foot jackass.
JAKE: I could do that. I have got good shoes.
BLANSTON: I'm hungry. Maybe we should pull over at that big ass thermometer up ahead so you can smoke and I can eat.
JAKE starts chugging one beer can after another then belches as in the distance we can see the World Famous Bun Boy sign and logo near Baker, California.
For more: CLICK HERE
August 19, 2005
I have been thinking about the chain of events in my life the past couple of years and am thrilled by how things have turned out. Ever since I met Asia , that chain of events seems more significant. I left Vegas in late June for Dallas back in 2003. What I went for failed miserably (business, the associates lied to me about facilities, etc) and with my tail tucked between my legs, I planned on heading to Nashville for the summer.
Something said not to go so I turned the car around and went to Los Angeles . I hadn't any plans, I just dropped in at my sister's, set up the internet and tried relaxing for the first time in 5 years. That was the 4th of July.
Over that month I set up a sushi party that went really well for August 6th. I invited a lot of people and we had folks you might know from my websites or even message board but Asia and Bud (her ex-husband) declined to come (I didn't know it was her birthday).
Someone who did show up though was Devin Devasquez, a Playboy Playmate I had known since I was working on a Joe Weider job. As we were all talking, she asked where I was staying since getting to L.A. The conversation turned into her renting a room to me in her Hollywood Hills house.
Once moved in on August 15th, I emailed Asia and told her I was living with a mutual friend and thought she might want to pop by to discuss her promoting a product I created. She agreed and I thought it was pretty cool but I had no idea there was going to be sparks flying on August 26th, 2003 ...
As we near the 2nd Anniversary of our first meeting I find myself running these events through my mind again and again. I present them quite vague in description but I cannot tell you how I feel fate is a marvelous thing. Ok, now to make anniversary plans for next week. What to do? What to do?
August 15, 2005
MySpace.com has fallen to the attacks made upon their server and personal accounts in return for the identity theft they pulled on my wife... Thank you for your help. Not long afterwards, we began having message board problems, ironic, yeah... We were down for a day but are back up again as well. Internet wars, aren't they fun? But who won? We did. Now the world knows you cannot trust MySpace.com...
August 11, 2005
MySpace.com has allowed a fake Asia Carrera to post blogs on their boards... AGAIN. I contacted them when this happened last year and their owner at the time took it down but only after we proved we were who we are and then that was that... Well, the jerk has put it back up one more time... Yes, he is who is behind this facade.... So do us a favor and slam MySpace.com with complaints... Have everyone you know hear what a scam they run. For those of you who were not already aware, they do this to a lot of well known people so some of the celebrities you think are on MySpace... Aren't... Just like when you go to Date.com or something and think you are chatting with a hottie but it is a man instead... No? Check this out... A "Dan Hutton" has been in touch with me over the past year since this first happened and he in fact used to work for MySpace.com. One of his jobs was to create fake famous member accounts that would be taken down once caught... This got the "regular" members excited about supposedly mingling with stars... When busted, they would blame "anonymous" members for the fraud to cover their butts... "Sorry, we cannot disclose the identity..." Really? I bet if the FBI shows up on your doorstep you will cooperate... Anyhow, rally the troops, drop by MySpace.com and let them know what we think about people impersonating Don Lemmon's wife, Asia Carrera. You do not need a membership, just go to the contact page... CLICK HERE
August 8, 2005
This lovely lady to our right lost so much weight over the past 9 weeks that she can fit a good sized child inside a pair of old pants with her?
You should be...
She did it all for FREE just by being a member of my message board and taking advantage of the opportunities and gifts we bestow upon the group!
If you want to see what all the hoopla is about: CLICK HERE
ALSO NOTE - FOR THIS WEEK ONLY...
Our Supplement Club #1 which features a month supply of our Balanced Multi-Nutrient (aka the Perfect Vitamin) and the Perfect EFA Oil Blend (aka Lemmon's Oil) for $39.95 now includes a FREE 2 pound jar of our Complete Protein Powder for the same price.
Act now as the office has been informed this special deal is only good through this Friday.
To order, call: 1 - 800 - 228 - 0872
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